Last evening a good friend of mine from high school was here visiting his sick mother, so a few of us got together. Some of these folks I haven't seen in over 20 years. Times like this are great while they are happening and its fun to reminisce about the old days and laugh about times gone by. But for people like me, who think deeper thoughts than they really should sometimes, events like this bring up all sorts of feelings.
Though I am not what you call "old" by societal standards, you still realize how fast time goes. Your parents always told you that time goes faster the older you get. As teens you "poo-pooed" that and just wanted to be 21. But, as with most things that they told me, they were right. This morning I started thinking about how different a person I am from then, but then conversely, how little I actually have changed. In some ways I don't even remember the person I was in high school. I was very outgoing, but down deep pretty insecure. Aren't most teenagers? But then I thought, has that really changed? Yes, I am more secure in myself now than I was then, but aren't we all just nervous 13 year olds under the skin?
Grown women worry about what their friends will think of them and if they are too fat. Grown men worry about whether the will be accepted by their peers or succeed. The playing field may be different but the games we play with ourselves are the same.
My Mom was 65 years old and near the end of her life and she was still playing mind games with herself. She said she was being punished because of how she took care of her Mother and Father in their failing years. I thought she was nuts. My Mom was the example of how to take care of your parents. She did more for them than anyone else in her family and shaved years off her life doing it. My Mom had a phobia about going to resturants and sitting alone because of something mean girls did to her in middle school. She carried this into her late adult life. Yesterday, as I got ready to go meet my friends, I worried if my thighs looked fat.
So when you chastise your young child or teen to not worry about what everyone else thinks, don't be too hard on them. Yes, its a good lesson, but remember before you teach it, "physician-heal thyself!"
Saturday, April 30, 2011
Friday, April 22, 2011
Happy Easter, for real
Easter means many thing to people. For some its an excuse to gorge on chocolate a peeps (a personal favorite). For some its a time for family, fun and watching the Ten Commandments on TV. (This was mostly what my childhood was like, mind you.)
But something happend to me a couple of years ago when I went to Wal-mart the day before Easter. I needed some ingredients for a supper I was making for my Mom and Dad. I had no idea that this would be the last Easter I would spend with my Mom. But that's another story. As I walked into the super store, people were running around crazily, buying baskets, ribbons, and chocolate. Stuffed bunnies were stacked along with stuffed chicks in carts and people were nearly running each other over to get the now discounted items before the big day.
Normally I would ignore all this chaos and just go get my spices and get out of there. But a feeling overwhelmed me and I nearly broke into tears in the middle of the aisle. These people don't get it. They really, really don't get it. Now, don't me wrong, there could have been Christians in there getting bunnies and baskets and I don't think there is anything wrong with that aspect of Easter. But I didn't get the impression as they hoarded their peeps that they cared very little about the empty tomb, the cost and sacrifice that was given to allow them the chance to get more from life than a box of sugar covered marshmallows.
The point to all this isn't that people don't really get it. You already knew that. The point was that it bothered me. It really, really bothered me. So either I have grown up and suddenly loved mankind more or God has finally penetrated the crunchy candy exterior around my heart. I am thinking the latter, because frankly, as I get older I dislike people more under my own power. But with God's influence, I love them more. Freaky huh?
So, I got my stuff, and drove home to my husband who was mystified at my tears streaming down my face as I carried in my little plastic sack from "The Walmarts".
I told him what happened and he smiled at me. I told him it wasn't funny, but he said he didn't think it was funny, he just thought it was something he would never see from me. Back story, as a group, people annoy me. I yell when I drive. I call people names on the TV that are stupid. I have a real problem loving thy neighbor. So, yes, this was miraculous.
So as you eat your peeps (still ok with them by the way), watch Ten Commandments, and watch your kids color Easter eggs, please remember that a divine being decided that all us annoying people, those that yell at people when they drive, fight over discount chocolate at "the walmarts" and watch too much reality TV, are worth saving and loving. This particular divine being became a person like us, that more than likely felt like yelling at stupid people (since he was divine that meant everyone), smacking his disciples around and saying FIGURE IT OUT, but acted perfectly and lived a sinless life. Then, get this, he LET the Jews and the Romans, beat him up, strip him naked, drag him through the street and nail him to a cross so we would have the chance to not be stupid people in God's eyes. He, on purpose mind you, because he could have stopped all this at any time, died and went into the tomb for three days. I hate going into funeral homes, let alone going into a grave, on purpose.
He did it for us. For the woman that yells at her kids at the walmarts, for everyone.
That is what Easter is all about Charlie Brown.
But something happend to me a couple of years ago when I went to Wal-mart the day before Easter. I needed some ingredients for a supper I was making for my Mom and Dad. I had no idea that this would be the last Easter I would spend with my Mom. But that's another story. As I walked into the super store, people were running around crazily, buying baskets, ribbons, and chocolate. Stuffed bunnies were stacked along with stuffed chicks in carts and people were nearly running each other over to get the now discounted items before the big day.
Normally I would ignore all this chaos and just go get my spices and get out of there. But a feeling overwhelmed me and I nearly broke into tears in the middle of the aisle. These people don't get it. They really, really don't get it. Now, don't me wrong, there could have been Christians in there getting bunnies and baskets and I don't think there is anything wrong with that aspect of Easter. But I didn't get the impression as they hoarded their peeps that they cared very little about the empty tomb, the cost and sacrifice that was given to allow them the chance to get more from life than a box of sugar covered marshmallows.
The point to all this isn't that people don't really get it. You already knew that. The point was that it bothered me. It really, really bothered me. So either I have grown up and suddenly loved mankind more or God has finally penetrated the crunchy candy exterior around my heart. I am thinking the latter, because frankly, as I get older I dislike people more under my own power. But with God's influence, I love them more. Freaky huh?
So, I got my stuff, and drove home to my husband who was mystified at my tears streaming down my face as I carried in my little plastic sack from "The Walmarts".
I told him what happened and he smiled at me. I told him it wasn't funny, but he said he didn't think it was funny, he just thought it was something he would never see from me. Back story, as a group, people annoy me. I yell when I drive. I call people names on the TV that are stupid. I have a real problem loving thy neighbor. So, yes, this was miraculous.
So as you eat your peeps (still ok with them by the way), watch Ten Commandments, and watch your kids color Easter eggs, please remember that a divine being decided that all us annoying people, those that yell at people when they drive, fight over discount chocolate at "the walmarts" and watch too much reality TV, are worth saving and loving. This particular divine being became a person like us, that more than likely felt like yelling at stupid people (since he was divine that meant everyone), smacking his disciples around and saying FIGURE IT OUT, but acted perfectly and lived a sinless life. Then, get this, he LET the Jews and the Romans, beat him up, strip him naked, drag him through the street and nail him to a cross so we would have the chance to not be stupid people in God's eyes. He, on purpose mind you, because he could have stopped all this at any time, died and went into the tomb for three days. I hate going into funeral homes, let alone going into a grave, on purpose.
He did it for us. For the woman that yells at her kids at the walmarts, for everyone.
That is what Easter is all about Charlie Brown.
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
Joy in Adversity-or not
Caution: Christian content ahead. If you would rather not read, I'm sure there is a re-run of Law and Order playing somewhere. Flip to TNT and I will join you in a bit.
The Bible says in Romans 5:3 that we are take joy in our suffering, as it leads to perseverance. We have been discussing this in Sunday School as well. Grieving allows us to help others, it draws us closer to God.
Let me preface by saying I agree with all of this. But when adversity starts to pile on top of adversity, you kind of get a little prickly.
I found out this week that my great Aunt, the lady that we all thought would live forever, may have cancer. Though I haven't talked to the doctor yet, he blithely said to her that he would not do surgery on her due to her age. O.K, I agree with this too. If it would make her last few days, months or years on earth less enjoyable or make her quality of life less, I agree with this. But that isn't what I am talking about today.
Joy in adversity is something that I have found to be totally misunderstood by the general public and non-Christians. I had someone tell me once that, "Don't you Christians look for ways to suffer so your God will approve of you more? Aren't you supposed to smile all the time when bad stuff happens to you?" Uh. No.
Christians aren't masochists. We don't flog ourselves each night to more approved of Christ. (Well I don't anyway.)
God knows we need time to grieve. He knows we don't want to lose our loved ones to terminal illness or even to old age. He knows we have a limit. That's why we are supposed to lean on Him ALL THE TIME, so that when these things happen, it isn't foreign to us to do it.
I agree that I am a little depressed today. Another death or illness so quickly will be very difficult for me to go through, even with Christ's help. But to know real Joy in your life, you are supposed to rely on God for all things, so we can be ready for the good and the bad.
That doesn't mean I won't take to my bed, watch hours of Law and Order and Bones and eat a pizza, peeps (hey its Easter) and anything else I can find until I feel like facing the world. God gets me, after all. That's why he's God.
The Bible says in Romans 5:3 that we are take joy in our suffering, as it leads to perseverance. We have been discussing this in Sunday School as well. Grieving allows us to help others, it draws us closer to God.
Let me preface by saying I agree with all of this. But when adversity starts to pile on top of adversity, you kind of get a little prickly.
I found out this week that my great Aunt, the lady that we all thought would live forever, may have cancer. Though I haven't talked to the doctor yet, he blithely said to her that he would not do surgery on her due to her age. O.K, I agree with this too. If it would make her last few days, months or years on earth less enjoyable or make her quality of life less, I agree with this. But that isn't what I am talking about today.
Joy in adversity is something that I have found to be totally misunderstood by the general public and non-Christians. I had someone tell me once that, "Don't you Christians look for ways to suffer so your God will approve of you more? Aren't you supposed to smile all the time when bad stuff happens to you?" Uh. No.
Christians aren't masochists. We don't flog ourselves each night to more approved of Christ. (Well I don't anyway.)
God knows we need time to grieve. He knows we don't want to lose our loved ones to terminal illness or even to old age. He knows we have a limit. That's why we are supposed to lean on Him ALL THE TIME, so that when these things happen, it isn't foreign to us to do it.
I agree that I am a little depressed today. Another death or illness so quickly will be very difficult for me to go through, even with Christ's help. But to know real Joy in your life, you are supposed to rely on God for all things, so we can be ready for the good and the bad.
That doesn't mean I won't take to my bed, watch hours of Law and Order and Bones and eat a pizza, peeps (hey its Easter) and anything else I can find until I feel like facing the world. God gets me, after all. That's why he's God.
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